Pausing and Reprioritizing

It changed my life…

by Mark Linsz, Co-Founder and Senior Managing Partner, MyNextSeason

With the peak of the baby boom in 1960, we’re less than one year away from that group reaching the typical retirement age of 65 in 2025. If you’re one of those people planning to retire in 2025 or shortly beyond, you’ve probably been considering factors around your assets to ensure a financially stable future. However, one often overlooked aspect of retirement that people should consider ahead of making the jump is building relationships that will support you on your new journey.

When you are in the heat of the battle as a corporate executive, it’s hard to imagine what’s on the other side.

In mid-2012, I took a moment to reflect on the previous five years. At that time, I was the Treasurer of Bank of America and often found myself thinking back on the Global Financial Crisis: the turbulent summer and fall of 2008, the Lehman and Merrill weekend, the bank downgrades, and the capital raises. My family and I had moved twice—first from London to New York and then from New York to Charlotte. Due to my daughters’ school schedules, I had to commute for seven months with each move. My days were long, and adrenaline filled, and my nights were often sleepless as I mentally prepared for the next day or worried about what the crisis would bring next.

While taking stock of my life and the events of those years, I decided to ask my wife, Becky, some difficult questions. I feared her answers but knew they were necessary. I asked, “How have I been doing as a husband and father? Am I spending enough time with you and our three girls? Am I around enough?”

I was apprehensive about her response but never expected what she told me. Becky shared her concern that I seemed to focus solely on work and our immediate family. She observed that I had given up time with friends and extended family, which worried her. She saw how my work permeated my mind and mood and strongly felt that I needed a hobby or something else to engage my heart, mind, and time. That conversation with Becky was a wake-up call and a gift.

I found myself unable to shake her words as I prepared to retire from Bank of America and begin my journey as a co-founder of MyNextSeason, which supports organizations’ talent through critical times of growth and change across the career continuum. I knew Becky was right, but how could I fit more into my schedule? It felt nearly impossible.

I felt as though I had always valued relationships, but in truth, I had taken no time in the preceding five years to build new relationships or to deepen old ones. I quickly recognized that was a part of my life I had to change.

I started by prioritizing establishing and deepening relationships with several friends. It required being intentional in scheduling an early breakfast, a coffee, or a drink in the evening. I had to make a point of spending time with people I cared about.

Shortly after that conversation with Becky, a friend that I had reconnected with invited me to a golfing weekend. My gut reaction was swift; I did not have the time for golfing with friends. I had a full plate; the girls’ schedules were full of things I needed to be present for, the to-do list at home was long, and frankly, I was a horrible golfer.

Thankfully, I consulted my best personal advisor (Becky) on the matter before responding to my friend. Becky strongly encouraged me to go, and after much agonizing, I decided to say yes. I realized it was an opportunity to strengthen several relationships that were of importance to me and possibly build new ones.

The weekend was a blast. The relationships that I formed then are among my closest today. As a bonus, I realized that the challenging, invigorating sport of golf cleared my mind as it helped me build those relationships. (And I have gotten better, by the way!)

As I began to think about retiring, those friends helped me think through what I needed to add back into my life and encouraged me to dream about the future again. In addition to an occasional round of golf, I joined a couple of not-for-profit boards and began mentoring a group of young business professionals on business and faith.

It has been over 10 years since I retired, and I am so grateful to those friends who cared enough to help me through the transition and encouraged me to pursue passions outside of work. My friends were there to help me think about finishing my job well and processing my own Next Season. They continued to be there for me to brainstorm and bounce ideas off of as I grew MyNextSeason into what it is today.

We’ve shared ideas, advice, and challenges—not to mention lots of great food. None of that would have happened had I not paused to take stock of my life, been open to observations and coaching from someone who knows me well and loves me and been open to reordering life’s priorities.

I still remember the feeling in my stomach as I asked those questions of Becky. I never thought her answer and encouragement would have such a profound impact on my future.

Pausing and reprioritizing is absolutely worth it. It has certainly made retirement for me more fulfilling!