Conversations Matter

by Debbie Dellinger, Director of External Engagement

When the COVID-19 pandemic hit, one of my sons sent Facebook Portals to each member of our family and scheduled Friday night family meetings. Using the Portal allowed us to catch up “face to face” which was reassuring as the pandemic unfolded. We counted on each other to show up for our Friday night gatherings to share information and stay connected in each other’s lives. We had conversations.

We count on others in our professional lives as well – for information helpful to meeting goals, achieving results, solving problems, as well as for learning and developing. My clients, transitioning from all-encompassing careers, have spent years building relationships with subject matter experts and peers across industries and functional areas to do their jobs well and stay current in critical areas of expertise. They’ve invested in others, identifying talent and developing both individuals and teams. These highflyers have ongoing conversations – listening and sharing – in an exchange of information that is important to their collective successes as well as those around them.

In your career, life, and transition, you need other people.

No one goes it alone. As I’ve supported executives through the transition from their careers to robust portfolios of professional and personal engagements and activities, I’ve learned the most successful transitions include conversations with people they know – and with those whom they would like to know.

I have a friend who loves to read and a few years ago, he enjoyed a book by English New Testament Scholar N. T. Wright. So much so, that when preparing for a trip to the UK, my friend reached out to Bishop Wright to invite him to tea – he did not know him at all! Wright responded affirmatively and my friend not only had a great conversation but made a new friend. They stay in touch to this day.

Networking at its best is initiating a series of conversations based on shared interests and respect. Here are five tips for those in transition to continue having ongoing and interesting conversations:

1. Finish well and let people know how to contact you following retirement – an email before you leave is a strong move

2. Brainstorm a list of people with whom you would like to have a conversation based on your interests – current and aspirational

3. Make a plan for reaching out to people and stick to it

4. Be flexible and listen well – you may discover something you had yet to think of

5. Keep track of your conversations so you know where you left off and where to begin again

Know that people will be delighted to hear from you and love to talk about what they are doing. You’ve developed relationships during your lifetime of living and working. Make a plan and take the time to connect with this unique group of people. You may renew relationships, make new friends, and discover opportunities both professional and personal. And you will have great conversations!