Leaving on my terms
As retirement approached, it was important to me to leave at the top of my game and not wait too long. I had what I considered a dream career as an international lawyer, responsible for big, complex issues and overseeing a global team. I loved the work, and I loved the people. Making sure there was a proper handoff to my successor also mattered to me, especially because so much of what I had learned came from years of living and working overseas.
I had no real retirement plan. When an early retirement package came along, I decided to take it, even though there was a chance I might need to go back to work. To gain clarity, I worked with a financial advisor and connected with MyNextSeason. These steps helped me think through possibilities and imagine what my own brand of retirement might look like. One key takeaway from MyNextSeason was the importance of “the pause.” After an intensive career, I needed time and space to reflect before committing to something new.
An unexpected phone call
Shortly after I retired, I received a phone call that changed everything. For years, I had maintained relationships with professors at the University of South Carolina’s Darla Moore School of Business, where I had been involved with the international business program. They called to ask if I would serve as a Visiting Fellow.
The role was not full-time teaching. I would spend a week on campus in the fall and another in the spring, delivering lectures and speeches; meeting with students, faculty, and community leaders; and doing related events and activities, such as writing thought pieces and, in one case, doing a radio talk show (my first!). What I discovered is that schools are eager for professionals to share their personal lessons from the field. Students want to hear real-world stories. Faculty members value practical perspectives on the topics they teach in class.
One yes led to another
One opportunity led to another. The university’s law school invited me to deliver a keynote speech on human rights from the perspective of a business lawyer. Through that event, I met attorneys who were doing talks on international law across North Carolina, my newly adopted home state. Today, I help lead efforts that connect practicing international lawyers with students at North Carolina’s seven law schools and coordinate the North Carolina Bar Association’s international law continuing legal education program.
Through my work as a Visiting Fellow, I’ve also participated in video calls with young lawyers in Ukraine. I’ve spoken with think tanks in South Asia about doing business with China. I gave a talk on US trade issues for the podcast of a lawyer in Brazil.
None of those opportunities were in my plan, but I simply stayed open. And when asked to do something, I always said yes. Quality matters. Every time I’m asked to present or write on a topic, I work hard to make it an excellent product. I prepare, I research, and I try to make every talk relevant and engaging. Those efforts have opened doors I never expected.
Giving back where I started
One of the things that has brought me the most joy was creating two scholarship endowments at my hometown high school. Originally, I planned to leave funds to create the scholarships in my will. Then I thought, “Why wait until I’m gone?” By setting up the scholarships now, I could meet the recipients and help them with their careers.
When I grew up, my hometown had just three stoplights. It was a wonderful childhood, and I was fortunate to see much of the world. Now I return to speak with students there, and I love those conversations. The scholarships support students pursuing international studies and math. One recipient this year plans to study business and Mandarin, a language I studied and used in my own career. Watching their journeys unfold is incredibly rewarding.
Don’t wait too long
Five years before I retired, one of my senior teammates in Germany retired. About a year later, I called him to see how things were going. His advice was simple: “Don’t wait too long.” Now I find myself sharing the same message.
There are joys and opportunities waiting that are difficult to see in the middle of a demanding career. There is also a clock ticking. Age issues will catch up with everyone, so it’s critical to fully enjoy the people and the things that require energy, health, and curiosity while you can. Moving from Atlanta to Raleigh, North Carolina, reinforced that lesson. We left behind a community we enjoyed to be closer to family, and I had to start building new connections. That meant asking people I barely knew to coffee and lunch, putting myself out there, and being open and intentional about meeting people. It has been a healthy reinvigoration and a reminder that new friendships and experiences are possible at any stage of life.
Apart from the new connections I’ve made, another highlight of retirement has been reconnecting with friends and family after years—sometimes decades—apart. I tracked down a college friend I had lost touch with, and before long, we were on the phone asking, “So what have you been doing for 40 years?”
What’s remarkable is how quickly you pick up where you left off, remembering why you became friends in the first place. Since retiring, I’ve visited my college roommate in Hawaii, gone hiking with a friend in Oregon, and spent a wonderful afternoon with my mother’s youngest brother, who is now 94 years old. I’ve come to realize that the time to reach out is now.
Making room for joy
What surprises me most today is how busy I am. Between travel, family, students, lectures, new friendships, and community involvement, there never seems to be enough time. In fact, I laugh when I think about all the books I planned to read in retirement. I still haven’t gotten to most of them. But that’s okay. Retirement has given me the freedom to pursue opportunities I never could have planned for and to make time for things that simply bring me joy. Some of those have been significant, like teaching and mentoring. Others have been much simpler. Growing up, I never had a dog, so getting a puppy has been one of the unexpected highlights of this chapter. It makes me feel like a kid again.
I’ve also pushed myself in new ways. A runner for over 25 years, I had somehow never run in a race. When I
retired, my daughter asked if I would run a half marathon with her. Why not? I trained for months, but the day of the race, my humble goal was simply to finish, and I ended up second in my age group. Knowing I loved airplanes, my wife surprised me with a flying lesson, leaving me excited and a little nervous when we arrived at the flight school. Once airborne, the pilot let me take the controls while she explained how everything worked. I have never been in more awe of what pilots do!
My wife and I make a point of planning adventures together. Sometimes that means traveling somewhere in the country or the world. Occasionally, it is simply playing hooky from our everyday life right at home—spending the afternoon exploring an art museum or doing something completely unplanned because it sounds fun.
I’ve learned that retirement is not about slowing down. It’s about creating space for what matters most. Looking back, I’m grateful I didn’t wait too long. Once you step off your career, all sorts of opportunities begin to appear—opportunities to learn, to give back, to reconnect, and to enjoy the life you’ve worked so hard to build.